So there was the melt down pre Boston and then there was a long plane ride and then there was some action....
When I was in Boston I saw a therapist... and it really helped me! I know its not very British but I totally believe that just as you go to the physio to fix your leg you can go to a therapist to fix your head and heart! In Boston my therapist really helped and she did say that I might want to see someone back in the UK because moving from the USA to the UK is a big move and I may feel the need to have someone to talk to about it all.
You know what - she was right... Like I said in my last posting - my life is great, I love seeing my old friends and my family, and I also love spending time with the new people in my life! Life is good! But there is a but....
I would love to meet someone, I would love to be in love and be loved and I would really love to be a Mum! But there is something stopping me and I think its me! So having got a recommendation from someone I called them and made an appointment for the Friday when I got back from Boston.
With some trepidation off I went.... and I think I walked out 100lbs lighter. I hadn't realised how much I needed to talk, how much I had to say and how much I just needed the time for me.
This is absolutely no reflection on my amazing friends and family whom I can and do talk to... and who listen and question and hug and love me and I thank you all from the bottom of my heart becuase I would be in a much worse place were it not for you.... but sometimes having someone else to talk to is really very useful. This lady is qualified to look for the things I am saying / not saying / to probe on things that I skim over, laugh at in a funny laugh that isn;t really a laugh...
So my journey has begun.... I have taken a positive step forward and I feel SO much better for it! I am taking more time for me, finding time to be quiet and let my brain go where it wants to go... and not immediately stepping in and changing the course of where its going by doing something else!!
We will see where the journey takes me.... I know already its going to be interesting!!
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